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Credit where credit is don't

Posted on March 29, 2019 by FASHIONISLANDBLOG

I know it's super-weird to see Bruce Arena say he's doing a good job as coach, but somehow J.R. Salazar quotes Arena as doing just that.

Whoo! Set DEFCON level to TOLD! And here I thought all this time Bruce Arena was his own biggest critic.

Arena's confidence in the face of the ungenerous has filtered down, which may have been the idea. Omar Gonzalez claims the Galaxy have been right for months now, despite the evidence of our eyes:

At least Arena acknowledged that the Galaxy weren't necessarily out of their "sluggish" period. In the words of Shakespeare – gee, really? The numbers tell the story.

Let's be kind and start with the 2-1 Puerto Rico "win," which knocked the Galaxy out of CONCACAF with plenty of room to spare. Since "winning" in Puerto Rico, the Galaxy have notched six wins, three losses, one tie, and one moral victory over Real Madrid. Pretty good. The goal differential for this series of games?

Go on. Take a guess. I'm going to check my math while you do, because I'm thinking, "that can't be right."

In fact, let's take out the Madrid game – it was a friendly, after all. Your team has spent the past two months going 6-3-1. What do you think their goal differential was during that sequence?

Plus 2. It would have been plus 1, but I threw out the Madrid game.

That's very hard to do, winning twice as many games as you've lost and only outscoring opponents by two goals.

And who have the Galaxy played? The Red Bulls away, 1-0. Pretty good. A crummy road loss to San Jose. An ugly home loss to the Wizards, which right now is the reason that very average team isn't out of the playoffs yet.

September started with a tie in Chicago…pulled out of their ass at the last minute, after being a man up for over an hour. Unimpressive. Most unimpressive. Yoda has taught you poorly.

That 3-1 win over Columbus looks a lot less dazzling now that the Crew haven't won an MLS game in five tries. That 2-1 win over DC United isn't good on paper, even less so when you remember it took Landon Donovan magic in the last ten minutes to turn that sow's ear into a silk purse. The Galaxy looked horrible for all ninety minutes in that overhyped match against the Red Bulls. And now two wins in a row against the godawful Goats and the godawful Union, both of whom were let into the game for most of the second half.

So, yeah. The Galaxy have been sluggish. They've gotten fat off their fellow slugs, and are the league's biggest frauds right now.

If Bruce Arena and Landon Donovan really want the Galaxy to be acknowledged as the league's best, beating Colorado will…well, it'll help. Conor Casey and Omar Cummings always torture the Galaxy. But the Rapids are certainly not great. No great team hands this year's DC United three points at home. If the Galaxy are who they're trying to make us believe they are, then the Galaxy handle the Rapids easily. I don't think they will, and I'm pretty sure the Galaxy don't think they will, either.

Sadly, I'll miss the game for a couple of reasons. One, the Fox v. Dish Network that for some weird reason isn't affecting Fox Soccer Channel? Well, it's affecting the local Fox sports channel that show Galaxy games. Soy un perdedor. Get crazy with the cheez whiz.

Fortunately, the Galaxy don't need my help for a change. They're claiming this one is a full-on grass berm sellout, the first this year. A theoretically healthy Beckham and non-theoretically terrible local baseball and college football teams help, but seeing as how I've been ripping the Galaxy for not selling out all year, the least I can do is acknowledge it when they do. And for the tough but unfashionable Pids, to boot. Good work.

"But it's a Galaxy home game, you plastic part-timer, why aren't you going?" you may well ask. Well, my wife is going in tomorrow for a giosostomy. I'll try to check in during the weekend, but if I'm not around, it's because I'm swimming upstream to spawn.

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